Soar-Dream-France: March 2017

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March 2017

March 31, 2017

Putting St. Therese to Work

With so much change and so much swirling around in my life; it isn't always easy to keep all of those plates spinning. It never fails. I think I have a plan and something or someone throws a monkey wrench into the works. (I must confess however, that sometimes in retrospect the monkey wrenches can be a good thing.) That's what happened again in early February when I discovered that my tenant in the apartment was planning to move.

The tenant wrapped up with me on Wednesday evening. I went back in yesterday morning and got to work.

It is never as you expect. There is of course always work to be done. Yesterday I focused on: totally purging the inside; covering the windows; getting a start on the cleaning with the kitchen sink; and doing what little I could to recapture our place and stir the positive energy.

For me, that means flowers, candles and twinkie lights.

It seems to be working. Before the day was out, I'd also brought some tapered candles over in wine bottles AND our St. Therese of Lisieux altoid altar to stir the gratefulness and joy in the little things.

It didn't take long for our place to feel "different"...just cleaning the sink and covering the windows that had never been covered made for a softer, sweeter, more nurturing environment.

Of course, there's more to do.

I have a list.

It will come.

Posted at 11:18 AM in Fabulous Friends and Family, Mélange-ing Magic, New Orleans NOW, Photography | Permalink | Comments (0)

March 30, 2017

A Journey in Time-Slipping Steps

Returning to everyday life after a "life-changing experience" is a challenge. In addition to adjusting to the differences between life in the Lot and life in New Orleans; I had no 9-5 "regular" job lined up to return to. A major infrastructure to my life no longer existed. I spent a lot of time feeling like I was on the outside looking in and trying to figure out just where I fit.

Although I returned to Tour de Faure and Cahors to visit friends from '98 to 2002; I feared I'd lost the centering magic of that time in the Lot. I had my foot on the first step to getting back on that train. I struggled. I fought.

I tried to be as present as possible and pay attention to what was going on for me in New Orleans and what I was feeling when I would return to the Lot. Had I lost the Lot, or was this just part of tiny steps along an unknown path that needed to be taken?

During a visit to Tour de Faure, I realized that I needed a place of my own in the Lot. I wasn't sure what that would look like. I talked with some friends there. I talked wtih friends here. I explored.

I was hoping to put the puzzle pieces together for myself to recapture the Lot I'd lost when I was and wasn't there. Is it possible that I would find that one piece to make it all fit? Only time and patience would tell.

Happy Thursday!

Posted at 10:38 AM in Fabulous Friends and Family, France Life, Just One..., Mélange-ing Magic, New Orleans THEN, Photography | Permalink | Comments (0)

March 29, 2017

Our Gorgeous Guy Gaston

By now, most of you will have seen the GastonFest happening over on my FB page and on the page for Les Amis des Animaux. This may seem sudden to some of you. It's not!

The moment I saw this sweet boy on the Les Amix des Animaux site, I told myself that if he were not adopted by the time Sammie Cat and I returned to France that we would consider it.

I've been keeping my eye on this boy ever since last September!

It's never been a secret, through no fault of his own; Gaston is missing his right ear flap. His first interim foster with Pam Garwood until a more permanent foster could be found, pushed him to me even more. Pam and I became friends through her fostering of Milli Vanilli last year, so it was easy to transfer that love that I already felt to Gaston. I continued to keep up with him after he went to his current foster with Lianne Gentle and her sweetheart Gentil!

Even with so many pushes, so many shares, and a couple of unsuccessful homechecks; there was still no one to adopt Gaston. During the last push, Suzy Mitchell and I were talking about Gaston.

It was her encouragement and support that pushed me to contact Lynn Hull and say more definitively, that if all else fails and no one comes forward who is suitable before I return to France; I would like to adopt Gaston.

I chuckle a bit because I think that Lynn tried to ease me in to this. We'd begun these more serious conversations last week, but on Sunday morning we were talking dates times and making arrangements. Last night, Gaston was RESERVED for us! We were ready!

When Dali, Sammie Cat and I moved to Cadrieu in 2006, I teased that we were full time French Girls now. For this move, we're going to be two French Girls and an authentic French Guy!

I'm laughing because my tarot card reader kept trying to tell me earlier in the year that he saw a man and a relationship for me in France.

He just didn't tell me that this guy would have four legs instead of two!

Needless to say, we are giggling and we are thrilled!

A very special thank you to Pam Garwood, Lianne Gentle and Lynn Hull for the photos that I've included in this post-actually, my friend Jan Robert took that shot of the Three French Girls! So many, so near, and so far have invested, loved and pushed for our Gorgeous Guy Gaston-HE and Sammie Cat and I say a HUGE MERCI!

Posted at 02:31 PM in Fabulous Friends and Family, France Life, Just One..., Mélange-ing Magic, New Orleans NOW, Photography | Permalink | Comments (0)

March 28, 2017

A Journey in Time-Step Five-Imagine MORE!

Back in the states that fall of '97, my head was spinning. A huge gift and opportunity were staring me in the face. The mind swirl continued to be: but I have a career, a home, pets, and responsibilities. So, I talked with friends and family and decided to see if two months away was possible.

The first step, I asked my boss if I could have two months of leave without pay to which I received a resounding NO! The second step or question, could I afford to leave my job? By July I was 5 years vested in my retirement. So, I decided to begin taking the money I put into retirement each month and put it into the Credit Union since I could then touch that extra money. Et voila...

...when I quit my job in July, I'd be fully vested in my retirement AND have extra money in savings to help fund the adventure and a stateside return to no employment.

I was off to five weeks on my own at Wendy's in Tour de Faure and three weeks in Paris.

I'd jumped train.

I figured that Paris was going to be easy peasy for me, but five weeks in the Lot...what was I going to do with myself for all that time?

Let go.

Imagine MORE...

Even though I chose these five weeks, I had put myself in a place where I was on my own, didn't speak the language, there were few people, and I knew only a few people. I had no routine to buoy me up and no structure to my minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, and time in general. I had to sit with myself.

This is when I think about the blank writer's page and the blank painter's canvass. There they are, staring you in the face. They are yours to do with as you wish and there is no one around telling you what to do and how it should be. What freedom! I was scared shitless, but I loved it.

I learned a lot in the Lot on my own that summer.

I enjoyed my coffee every morning while I wrote in my journal and waited for the mail man. I'd often write letters home, and you can be sure that all my friends had my addresses in Tour de Faure and Paris. Routine however, stopped there.

The butterflies and the snails became my friends. I learned to dance the ballet to Mozart on butterfly wings while I ran through the automatic sprinklers (with the help of a lot of Cahors wine) and became and expert on artistic snails who drew with their trail on terre cotta flower pots. I read. I cried. I had moments of crazy that rose to the surface after having been stuffed so low for so long during all those years I was imprisoned on the train.

I learned to find joy on my own. I learned that the surprises that come your way when you just STOP, can be more wonderful that anything you struggle to plan. I'm not sure I ever STOPPED!

I was not alone on this visit. I had a few friends from previous trips and made new ones. I learned to let them come to me.

I loved sitting and writing on my wine glass ledge and see who might be coming up around the bend to see me. I laughed when someone looked at this shot of my wine glass ledge and said: "I can tell from your photography that you are someone who enjoys your own company." And by that time, I did.

I got to me.

I found myself.

I could write a book about those five weeks at Wendy's.

Finding myself and falling in love with the Lot, I discovered that I longed for the Lot. Those three weeks in Paris turned out to be the difficult ones for me. It was impossible not to think about what my stateside return was going to mean for me.

There were to be new discoveries at every turn!

Posted at 01:56 PM in Fabulous Friends and Family, Food and Drink, France Life, Just One..., Mélange-ing Magic, New Orleans THEN, Overalls and More, Paris, Photography | Permalink | Comments (0)

March 27, 2017

A Journey in Time-Step Four-Come for a Year?

Having had a wonderful time with Wendy in Tour de Faure during '96, I jumped at an invitation to visit during the fall of '97 to keep her company. Imagine my surprise when I no sooner got off the train in Cahors and she says: Can you come live in our house for a year?

I immediately thought of all the reasons why it wasn't possible and tried to set aside the idea of a whole year in the Lot Valley.

Circumstances on this trip threw me on my own once more. I found myself enjoying my photography more, and yes...pondering the possibilities of staying at Wendy's.

I'm sure by now, you've noticed the theme:

I need to be forced to be plugged in and present in the moment.

Unexpectedly on my own for most of my visit; I read, wandered and took lots of photos. This is where my photography really began to take off.

This favorite photo got the ball rolling and pretty soon I was having small shows and selling shots to friends.

I was very much still on that train. I'd gotten a little better. I'd at least learned to look out the window and wave at the towns and scenery that were blowing by. This time on my own pushed me to make some decisions and to think "out of the box!"

Maybe I couldn't stay here at Wendy's for a year, but what about a couple of months?

As I watched St. Cirq Lapopie rise out of the mist each morning, I made up my mind that I was determined to find a way.

I'd found a quote in a book I was reading during this visit. It was by Robert Johnson, who said:

"If a fantasy is not responded to it becomes an energy leak. It is the creative faculty squandering itself into wishful thinking. Wishing for what one does not have is a symptom of unaligned energy."

I discovered that I am not a wishful thinker!

Posted at 01:24 PM in Fabulous Friends and Family, France Life, Just One..., Mélange-ing Magic, New Orleans THEN, Photography | Permalink | Comments (2)

March 26, 2017

The Bright and the Brilliant at Mahogany Oaks

After yesterday's soft and subtle, it seems only right that today should be a day of bright and brilliant at Mahogany Oaks (and I don't mean John and Mike-even though they are!)

Everything is so pretty and just so much fun to wander around in.

Do you see yourself as more of a soft/subtle or a bright/brilliant?

Maybe you're a mixture a both?

Maybe it depends on your moods?

It's always fun to ask these questions of others...

...and ponder them myself!

Happy Sunday!

Posted at 01:24 PM in Fabulous Friends and Family, Just One..., Mélange-ing Magic, New Orleans NOW, Photography | Permalink | Comments (0)

March 25, 2017

Flowering Photos at Mahogany Oaks

Of course, y'all already know that I'm out of photo control on the grounds of Mahogany Oaks, when Sammie Cat and I head across Lake Ponchartrain to hang out with Mike and John.

Our visit earlier in the week was no different. After this trip though, I've been playing around with some of the filters in my computer photo program.

With all the bright, harsh, glaring issues in every day life these days; I confess to trying to find the softer, subtler side of life in the flesh and in my photos.

Et, voila!

Don't get me wrong, I like the bright, brilliant, crisp, and glaring colors too. It's just that most mornings I seem to need to start with "soothing!"

Every season is a new adventure at

Mahogany Oaks.

With the early and unseasonable heat this year, I'd already missed most of the azaleas.

But as you can see, there was plenty to pique my photographic interest!

Happy Saturday!

Posted at 01:14 PM in Fabulous Friends and Family, Just One..., Mélange-ing Magic, New Orleans NOW, New Orleans THEN, Photography | Permalink | Comments (0)

March 24, 2017

A Journey in Time-Step Three: Train Strike

I believe that if we can pay attention and plug into our lives; there are messages everywhere! Some messages are subtle, but then there are those that smack you up the side of the head.

During May of '96, I was forced to plan a three week vacation for myself. It was a first for me, and probably only happened because I had leave that I would lose if I didn't take it. The first week was spent in Paris with Mom and then I headed off on the midnight train to Barcelona for a few days. Then, it was on to my first visit with Wendy in Tour de Faure, a few days in Venice, and back to Paris before returning to the states.

Well, at least that was the plan anyway!

After leaving Barcelona on my way to Cahors, the train stopped at La Tour de Carol in the Pyrennes. It was quite beautiful, but not part of the plan. Everything was thrown up into the air. A Norwegian cyclist befriended me and we were off on a different adventure than either of us had planned; that took us to Tarascon sur Ariege and the Hotel Confort there.

Our rooms were on the very top floor of the hotel. Imagine crawling up the stairs to the top floor, to be greeted by the clock tower that opened this post through my skylight window!

NOT So Subtle! And,

it sounded regularly!

I was finally able to get in touch with Wendy who was waiting for me at the train station in Cahors. Not knowing how long the strike would last; we canceled Venice and tentatively revised our plans together so that I would eventually meet her in Toulouse and spend more time with her. In the meantime, what to do with these "empty" days?

My friend and I would meet up for coffee and meals and then go our separate ways. I explored and found myself up at an overlook near the tower at the top of the village every day. Every morning I would walk over to the train station to see if the trains were running yet-and, return to my perch. I wrote in my travel journal:

"I am practicing being here-in the here and now. I am not too good at relaxing-sometimes I think it is work for me."

Frankly, it was TORTURE!

To help me keep my sanity, I also kept some free writing pages. There is a theme here, that continues on beyond this step:

"Maybe I'm missing something-Is there a whole part of life and living that I have managed to put somewhere that I can't reach?"

Here I was, for the first time in my life being forced to practice living in the moment...

"To walk down the street, to smell the flowers, to hear the birds sing, to feel the wind rustle the tendrills of my hair, to hear the French voices behind me, to hear the leaves crackle across the pavement, to hear the cars as they make the turn to descend the cliff behind me, to see the sun cast a shadow over the mountains, to feel the cool wind against my skin, to see the layers of white clouds encircle the mountain tops, to hear the ladies voices behind me become more distant and to be here-to be alive."

I was beginning to learn to live in my own life.

Why should it be so difficult?

Posted at 12:41 PM in France Life, Just One..., Mélange-ing Magic, New Orleans NOW, New Orleans THEN, Paris, Photography, Travel | Permalink | Comments (0)

March 21, 2017

A Journey in Time-Step Two: "Just One..."-Madame Vera Volmane

Learning to live in the moment and face what comes your way is still a challenge for me. I'm much better at it than I was all those years ago when these steps began. Facing the unexpected is difficult regardless of whether it's schedule changes, death, loss, hurricanes, etc. Arriving in Paris during February of 1995 to discover that my friend Madame Vera had literally passed away while my plane was landing, threw me into a sea of unknowns and floating time. That moment was heart-wrenching.

Here I was in Paris at Mardi Gras, having come off my month surgery respite to discover that my friend had died.

It felt as if my life was in total disarray! My knee jerk reaction was to adjust my ticket and catch the next plane home. I stayed. I'm so grateful I did. How different my life would be today if I hadn't?

Paris has always been my professor for living in the moment, letting go, and facing the unknowns. And so today, I share a post with you from the 2009 archives. I've adjusted a few photos, sprinkled in some pertinent pictures, and am retelling Laury's and Vera's story. It's rather grand and special. I hope you will enjoy OUR story:

9/13/2009-Have you ever looked back from where you are in your life right now, and wondered where you'd be today if just one thing had or hadn't happened? I don't know about you, but I have had many such experiences. Maybe it's the luxury of being almost 55 this year, but I can see the patterns and pieces of my life over the years to now exactly the way they fit. As I examine each step along the way-hold each piece to the puzzle in my hand and in my heart-I sometimes ask myself what if "Just One..." were different? Today I honor "Just One..." that has hugely impacted my life journey to now, with a photo and a poem and a tad bit of our story-my friendship with Madame Vera Volmane.

"Madame Vera," as she was introduced to me by my brother Tom, was someone I absolutely had to meet and see on my first trip to Paris in 1992. Vera was already in her 80's when I met her that January. She didn't leave her apartment on Rue Ballu anymore, but it didn't matter.

She made France and Paris come alive inside those walls for me.

We'd sit and talk for hours over coffees with her Marlboro cigarette flapping in the breeze with every word.

Shortly after our visit, a handsome ex-pat walked up to me on the street and asked if I had time for a "little conversation" that grew into a two-year romance. Every time I came to visit him, I'd be up to visit Vera at least twice. The ex-pat and I were the stuff of fairy tales that don't come true, so when it ended I still came to see Vera and stayed with her.

Speaking to Vera by phone just days before my 1995 arrival, she said: "I will have a coffee waiting for you."

And so...a poem to Vera:

Rue-2000

There is a friend upon my road. She loved me to the end of her earthly load...in Paris.

She spoke by phone from the Rue Ballu: "I will have a coffee waiting for you."...in Paris.

Eighty-seven years of writing and giving, she etched Paris on my heart by heart with her joy for living. I had to love her right from the start...in Paris.

From New Orleans to Orly to the Rue Ballu, to miss each other by moments, we never knew a last coffee and kisses held such importance...in Paris.

To be in Paris and grieve alone, quite unexpectedly on my own, from hotel to hotel in a misty rain, never to see my friend again...in Paris.

I love returning every year. I walk, I write, I "coffee" my days. She lives in my heart. I hold her near. It never really matters where, but the memories rise always...in Paris.

From New Orleans to Orly to the Rue Ballu, "I will have a coffee waiting for you."...Always in Paris.

I'm sure Vera is smiling. It's not Paris, but she sent me here. I ended up in a hotel where the concierge and I became friends and stayed in touch. Wendy and her husband were buying two old ruins in the Lot valley and invited me to visit. Because I lost Vera-I now have More than Paris.

The photo I chose is of Vera and her husband-a Russian actor. I teased Vera that someone should write the story of her life. I returned in '95 with a hand held tape recorder hoping to get the details of her amazing stories down. It wasn't meant to be.

Posted at 12:10 PM in Fabulous Friends and Family, Just One..., Mélange-ing Magic, Paris, Photography | Permalink | Comments (0)

March 20, 2017

A Journey in Time-Step One

Working 60+ hours a week until you turn 40 years old, puts you on a train from which it is difficult to disembarque! All stops flew by!

One would think that there would be a heavy sigh of relief, not the mental hysteria of:

What do I do? I have so much time to fill! I'm not used to having this much "space" in my life!

I had to be stopped and FORCED to be with myself.

Stopping was never a choice I made. Movement and doing made me feel alive. But somewhere in there; I lost important parts of me.

During that month, I was homebound and stuck on the first floor of Columbus Street. Mom was with me in the beginning. Friends came by regularly to check on me and see if I needed anything.

I couldn't drive, ride in a car, lift anything heavy, or go up and down stairs. I lived completely on the first floor of Columbus Street (acutally, not unlike today).