Soar-Dream-France

Mother's Day, VE Day, and Living Life

 

This will always be a favorite shot of me and my Mom. Here we are out together playing in the rocks at Nannie and Papa's place out in House Springs. I loved that place. There's not a doubt in my mind that this was the beginning of my "rock girl" self! For some reason, I always felt safe and happy in that place.

Is it any wonder that today, I am living surrounded by stone?

A week into this "new book;" I am realizing that living into this life is most important. Sounds easy, huh? It should be, but it's not.

 

 

I've been sleeping later in these mornings. The bird surround sound and bells are still my gentle whisper that the day has begun.

Even Lola, is sleeping by the window or on our big chair later than usual. Just looking at her fills me with so much love. 

I knew it was Mother's Day and VE Day when I woke.

There's also been so much talk on the news of Putin pushing harder in Ukraine, to be able to declare victory on this date as Russia did in 1945.

The world is watching, often in horror at the comparisons. 

 

 

 

Interestingly, the book I was reading and enjoyed finishing, None Stood Taller-The Final Year: One of the greatest love stories of World War Two, By Peter Turnham, climaxed on just this day in 1945.

While I've always been interested in the resistance, living here has brought those times and those stories even closer.

I have ravenously read many books about WWII, the Resistance, the SOE, the pillaged art, Ravensbruck and other camps, and so much more.

This morning, it carried me to Mom and Dad.

Mom would have been 14 and Dad 15.

They hadn't even met yet.

 

 

 

Both had older brothers that were in the military and served during WWII. Eventually, Dad joined the Air Force, Mom went over to the UK to marry Dad in '53, and I was born there in '54.

 

Reading this book and feeling those times, carried me there and back through history to today. I confess, to having past life feelings for this time period in history, long before I began reading in depth. I've often thought it was just listening to the stories Mom and Dad and other family members shared over the years. But then again, how serendipitous was this morning? 

 

 

This is where the living into your life and paying attention becomes important. It's the richness of life that comes to you when you have the luxury of being able to live into it and enjoy more (or at all) because you are paying attention.

 

Happy Mother's Day, Victory in Europe Day, AND Happy Sunday!

 

PastBooks Fun

 

Throughout my years of blogging and also using Facebook, I have found that there are some projects that I enjoy and use. I began purchasing the Social Books upon my return to the states in 2012 as a way to hang on to my memories of Cadrieu when I had to be stateside. As time went on, I began ordering the PastBooks which I eventually fell in love with. I learned that the PastBooks were best for me because my photography became the main focus. 

 

I've come to realize that they are a nice reflection of my times and photos. I've also started doing them as "annuals," so that I have a full year in each book. They are also particularly nice during these pandemic times and with me living as far away as I do from most family and friends in the states.

Seeing everyone this go round was even more fun. As Eric pointed out to me, with so many fewer social events, you notice how much thinner they are.

 

 

 

During 2020, I expected more of the barn roof photos so making 2019 this year was a must when I realized that 2019 truly was the year of the barn roof. Even though Lola came to me in December of 2020, she didn't figure prominently for me until 2021...lots of fun all around.

 

 

All this talk about photos and years has reminded me...2022 is the 20 year anniversary of the Chatette and I becoming a "we!" Hard to believe, and so much has happened.

 

 

Happy Wednesday!

 

Remembering Rilke

 

Over the years, one of the things that I try very hard to do is to live into the questions in my life. I was inspired by a card I had received from a long time, and still very dear friend of mine, that had this quote by Rainer Maria Rilke on the front:

"Be patient to all that is unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms, like books  written in a foreign language. Do not strive to uncover the answers: they can not be given to you because you have not been able to live them. And what matters is to live everything. Live the questions for now.

 

 

Perhaps then you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer one distant day in the future."

-Rainer Maria Rilke

 

I began to use this approach in my life. It hasn't always easy for an often over-anxious worrier, but it works. 

 

 

Lately, with the pandemic and much longer periods of solitude than I'm used to; I found myself having trouble with my days.

Remembering Rilke and how well living into the questions worked; I decided to try to use a similar technique to live into my days and live into my life.

It reminds me a lot of being present, living in the now, and paying attention to the natural flow to the universe and the how and where I fit.

 

 

 

Yesterday was one of those "living into my day" days.

 

As I was getting things done and attacking stateside problems, I wanted to treat myself. My hot off the press new Sebastian Faulks book, Snow Country, had arrived.

It was a pretty day.

I deserved a break.

So, I loaded myself up with my book, something to sit on, my favorite Thiriet ice cream bar, and headed down to hang out on the river for a bit.

I noticed that our fallen tree was in the same spot and the water from the lavoir and beyond, was pulsing into the river water, making waves and beautiful concentric circles.

 

 

The landing stones for the slip were beautiful as usual, but reminded me of warmer times...times with friends in the water; screaming at speeding boaters and water skiers, picnic lunches; water aerobics in the river on the rocks with Marina; wine; algae art; and, tiny fish all over my bare feet on the algae covered stone. Ah, the amazing memories!

Yesterday, I talked to the few tiny fish who were there. My ice cream bar was harder to eat than usual. It had melted some in its wrapper while I carried it down to the river in the pocket of my dress. The moving water music and the peace of place was a balm for the craziness of these times.

 

 

I headed back up after a bit, knowing I still had insurance people to track down in New Orleans. They all make me laugh when they thank me for how patient I have been. 

 

 

I think the living into the days and life are working too!

Happy Saturday!

 

Planning Our Hearts Out

 

Yesterday, I posted a profile frame on FB around my photo that said VOTE-Have a Plan. 

As I looked at that frame, I thought it was suggesting that we needed to have a plan of action for after we VOTE in case the man who currently occupies the White House loses and refuses to leave.

I've been so focused on this possible horrendous breach of our democracy, that I lost sight of the fact that many Americans are having to go the extra mile this election and even have to have a plan to just be able to VOTE PERIOD!

We have to be planning poor fools these days. 

How quickly we forget...

 

...I had my special plan for voting too!

 

 

So, here we all are with our plans to vote, plans for the results, and plans for what may or may not happen depending on what those results may be.

In New Orleans, they've already been threatened by 6 hurricanes this season.

No wonder we're all stressed out!

So much chaos...so many unknowns...everywhere!

Living with the Corona Virus adds many layers of planning for all of us.

Just leaving the house requires extra planning and protections.

 

 

 

Now, with winter and the holiday season upon us, we're being advised to evaluate our Thanksgiving and Christmas Holidays closely as travel and family get togethers are considered. This is where the triage of priorities goes into motion. What are you willing to risk to be with family and celebrate?

For me, I''m on my own here in France, as I was in New Orleans. I am fortunate to have friends in both places, but what about the holidays for me? While Thanksgiving was always a big deal with my family, I tend to focus more on Christmas. This year, I'm already pondering and planning what I'm going to do so I can do my very best to make this a special holiday season here, in spite of all of the insanity!

I have ideas! I'm usually pretty good at making things special when I'm on my own. And besides, it's really only up to me. That doesn't mean that things can't go wrong...but I'm getting excited about all that I can do between now and the holidays to make these times special. Or, should I say, MORE special?

 

 

 

I hope you will join me on my holiday planning journey into MORE SPECIALNESS! And then after all that planning, we can curl up by the fire with a good book, some chocolate and a glass of Cahors wine!

Happy Thursday!

 

A Sun With Staying Power

 

Yesterday's sun came in and out among the clouds, but unlike the others that were merely sun seconds before the rain, this one had staying power. I was energized. The sun stayed with us into the afternoon, and left me hoping that Sunday would truly be a 'Sun"-day. But, then the rains returned. 

 

 

Sitting on the stoop, I: journaled read a little of my new book by Samantha Power-The Education of an Idealist; had some coffee and cookies; checked out just how high the river was from the road; and, shot a few shots.

 

 

You know the river is high when it is rushing from the lavoir into the canal below the road, and the river is brown and covering up the boat slip below.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It felt good just to sit in the sunshine for a while. With all that energy-I was off to chores.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Happy Sunday!

 

On My Own and Proud

 

After a couple of dry days, I'd gone to bed planning to spend my Monday morning moving wood and cutting grass.

Snuggled in and cozy in my bed Sunday night, the rain began hard on the skylight and I knew my plans were foiled.

Ah, but there is that big ladder in the utility cave.

Because it is so big it is rather unwieldy. I got it out of the cave and then evaluated my next steps.

Initially, I thought I could just lift it up and over the wall-ha-ha! No way!

Instead, I did a rest, flip, and then pull across the tracks.

 

 

 

 

I got it over with less struggle than expected, but then it needed to be angled up the hill so I could ease it into the barn over the stones.

Then I would figure out how (or if), I could get it up onto the wall as I had planned.

You can see how the ladder bows in the middle, spindles are missing, and it's the middle that is major charcoal,

This ladder has never lived in the barn before...it was always inside the Chatette.

As I mentioned yesterday, my two ladder ladies are going to be barn roommates!

 

 

 

 

I sometimes have a way of making things harder on myself. Finally, I opened the other side of the doors, et voila!

I got it hauled in and tried to measure up to see if she would fit where I'd hoped to hang her and if the iron and wooden pegs were placed strategically enough for her to hang easily.

 

 

 

 

 

She's just a little heavy, but I did manage to get her up off the stone floor and then hoist her the rest of the way up on the second end.

Even so, that bow in the middle made her look unsteady. 

I took her down and turned her around.

 

 

 

 

This hanging was much more complicated and she dropped twice as I tried to stabilize her at each end. We shall see. For now she's resting on the stone. I may try again, or I may wait for Didier's return.

 

 

I'm always proud of myself when I can do these things on my own, but I do know when it's time to ask for help. Or as Dad says: Maybe asking for help sooner is better than asking later!

 

Thanks Dad, and Happy Tuesday!

 

Living on or Near Water

 

Every place I have ever lived in my life has been near or on water.

For me, it has been the Mississippi River that runs through both St. Louis and New Orleans, and now smack dab on the Lot River here in Cadrieu. To be honest, it's a real treat for me to live right on the Lot as I do. 

That said, I'm not a big boat or fisher-person. I became more interested in boats and fish when I began seriously dating a guy at university in St. Louis.

 

 

Not only did he introduce me to boats and fish, but F. Scott Fitzgerald and Ernest Hemingway were part of the deal too. F. Scott was easy for me. Hemingway took a little more work. I remember buying Hemingway's The Sun Also Rises and For Whom the Bell Tolls for him as a thank you for helping me with a repair on my '66 Pontiac Ventura! It's nice that after all these years, he and I are still friends.

 

When Evelyn gave me Paul Hendrickson's Hemingway's Boat to read and keep, my friend tip-toed through my memories.

It took no more than reading the synopsis and the introduction to know I had to check in to see if he had read it.

I dropped a FB note to him.

He hadn't read it, but said he was going to order it.

It seemed serendipitous, that my boat appeared on the Lot River amidst the dancing diamonds just as I had finished Hemingway's Boat. It felt like a sign.

 

 

The beauty and transcendence of this lone boat with a lone two-poled fisherman floating through the dancing diamonds right before my eyes, was surreal. My still heavy heart and the tears that flowed during and as I finished this book, pushed me to follow him along the river. I wanted to soak up his presence. I found I felt the diamonds and the love of a man and his boat beyond my tears.

 

 

I was aware of the skeletal basics of Hemingway's life, but the layers laid bare by Hendrickson in such personal and direct ways showed me how little I knew and understood about Hemingway the man.  It brought home the tapestries of love, loss, histories of nature/nurture and the so many circumstances beyond our control, once more. 

 

 

Hemingway's boat, Pilar...she holds it all!

 

 

 

 

Happy Sunday!

 

It Has Begun

 

So much for days of rest!

Yesterday morphed into much more than I had planned, but who would say NO to the beginnings of the work on the barn? Sitting in my comfy chair with Hemingway's Boat open for enjoyment, I heard clanging metal that sounded close by.

I was right!

 

There was Monsieur Feres with his truck on the tracks, unloading all the scaffolding to get us set up to begin the work on the barn's roof.

It was amazing to watch Didier's progress all by his lonesome.

I learned even more about the structure of our barn and its beauty.

The stone is stunning and climbed much higher that the edge of the roof. You can see how high the stone goes in the photo on the right!

 

 

 

 

 

Watching the old roof come "undone" down to her bones and listening to the tiles crashing below are bittersweet for me.

I've been hoping to get our girl a new roof ever since she became part of our "WE" back in May of 2010. It'll be almost ten years soon! 

 

 

And, here we are!

Of course, I'll be back!

 

 

Happy Thursday!

 

The Importance of Paris

 

It's Sunday morning in Cadrieu, but Rodin's "Thinker" and I are pondering Paris! Looking back at my photos from my day in Paris in 2014 and just finishing Matisse and Son for the third time, are once more reminding me of the importance of Paris in my life. I'm feeling immersed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Paris is one of my big "just ones"-no Paris...no Cadrieu. It's easier to look back to realize once more that if just one thing were different, I wouldn't be where I am (and who I am) today.

 

Paris was on my path. My "just one" Paris was chock full of many other just ones in my life. It's impossible to know when you are in the middle of it.

Then, Paris was France for me. Paris was my dream. I didn't think there was any more of France that I needed. How wrong I was! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cadrieu was my destiny.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And so today, as the sun rises over a beautiful Lotoise morning smack dab on the Lot River...I raise my cup of coffee and I say merci un million fois a Paris et beaucoup de bises!

 

Happy Sunday!

 

Resurrecting Matisses

 

Over the years, there have been books that I loved so much that I read them more than once...sometimes multiple times. Matisse-Father and Son, by John Russell is one of those books. And yes, it's encore time! 

I first read it in New Orleans when I borrowed it from Eric. I fell in love with: the story; the artist (all over again); the father/son relationship and love; and, their lifelong communication through letters. I read it a second time from here in 2014 when I borrowed it from Evelyn. And now 5 years later, I'm at it again.

With each read, I realize that my perceptions are impacted by where I am, what I'm doing, and, how I'm feeling. I seem to learn something new each time, even though I've read it before.

The best part for me is their letters. It also appears that father and son communicated with each other more comfortably in writing than face to face, especially on difficult issues. I often mourn the loss of letter writing these days.

It's a soft, sweet, raining day here in Cadrieu today. I celebrate the joy of reading a book I love at least one more time and that love and connection of letter writing. Give them a try sometime.

Happy Rainy Tuesday!